Secheresse: Why My Neighbor Showers in The Backyard With The Tomatoes

Something useful to do during the dry season...
 

Sécheresse

(sesh-ress)

noun, feminine

drought

If you were to sneak over to our backyard fence, part its curtain of faded jasmine, and look past a ditch full of wild fennel grown as tall as our older child, you'd spy our next-door voisin showering beneath the fiery heavens at daybreak, scrub-a-dub-dubbing right in the middle of his potager!

But you wouldn't see a steel nozzle above his head or an anti-skid mat beneath his feet. Only a sturdy kitchen stool separates him from the muddy ground below, with its neatly trellised vines—vines which are, oddly, bursting with fruit during this, The Year of the Drought....

There, amongst ripe red tomates, stands my eco-conscious neighbor, garden hose held high above his head. I see no shelves on which to set his shampoo (is that a vinegar rinse he is using?... they say old wine is good for both hair and plants!), and no modesty's-sake shower curtain protects him from this housewife-voyeur (hence those bright blue swim trunks). On closer look, there is a serene expression on the showerer's face, as water from the tuyau trickles over it, splashing and quenching the thirsty légumes beneath.

In this period of sécheresse, the municipal Powers That Be forbid us to water our gardens... but no one said you couldn't wash yourself! I watch as the shower water rains down over the would-be parched vegetables, and I am impressed with my neighbor's clever solution to irrigating his garden.

"You ought to try it sometime!" the man in the blue swim trunks calls out. I freeze, as would any nosy neighbor who has been found out.

My cheeks turn as red as those well-watered tomatoes and I quickly release the jasmine, letting the floral curtain fall to a close.

FRENCH TEXT translation by chat.openai.com

 

"La Douche du Voisin"

Si tu te faufilais jusqu'à la clôture de notre jardin, écartais son rideau de jasmin fané et regardais au-delà d'un fossé rempli de fenouil sauvage qui a poussé aussi haut que notre enfant aîné, tu apercevrais notre voisin d'à côté prendre sa douche sous les cieux ardents à l'aube, frottant, frottant, juste au milieu de son potager !

Mais tu ne verrais pas de pommeau de douche en acier au-dessus de sa tête ni de tapis antidérapant sous ses pieds. Seule un solide tabouret de cuisine le sépare du sol boueux en dessous, avec ses vignes soigneusement palissées - des vignes qui, curieusement, regorgent de fruits en cette Année de la Sécheresse...

Là, parmi les tomates mûres et rouges, se tient mon voisin soucieux de l'environnement, le tuyau d'arrosage tenu haut au-dessus de sa tête. Je ne vois aucune étagère sur laquelle poser son shampoing (est-ce un rinçage au vinaigre qu'il utilise ?... On dit que le vieux vin est bon pour les cheveux et les plantes !), et aucun rideau de douche pour protéger sa pudeur de cette curieuse ménagère (d'où ces maillots de bain bleu vif). En regardant de plus près, une expression sereine se lit sur le visage de notre doucheur, tandis que l'eau du tuyau lui ruisselle dessus, éclaboussant et étanchant la soif des légumes en dessous.

En cette période de sécheresse, les autorités municipales nous interdisent d'arroser nos jardins... mais personne n'a dit qu'on ne pouvait pas se laver ! J'observe l'eau de la douche tomber sur les légumes qui auraient dû être desséchés, et je suis impressionnée par la solution astucieuse de mon voisin pour irriguer son jardin.

"Tu devrais essayer un jour !" lance l'homme en maillot de bain bleu. Je me fige, comme le ferait tout voisin curieux qui a été découvert.

Mes joues rougissent autant que ces tomates bien arrosées et je lâche rapidement le jasmin, laissant le rideau floral retomber pour clore cette scène.

French Vocabulary

1. la clôture - the fence
2. le rideau - the curtain
3. le jasmin - the jasmine
4. le fossé - the ditch
5. le fenouil - the fennel
6. l'enfant (masc.) - the child
7. le voisin - the neighbor
8. la douche - the shower
9. le ciel - the sky
10. le lever du jour - the daybreak
11. le potager - the vegetable garden
12. le tuyau - the hose
13. la boue - the mud
14. le sol - the ground
15. la vigne - the vine
16. le fruit - the fruit
17. la tomate - the tomato
18. l'année (fem.) - the year
19. la sécheresse - the drought
20. la maison - the house

Your Edits here

Please help me edit this story for clarity and for typos. Click here to point out any formatting problems, as well. Thank you!

***

French definition of sécheresse by Petit Larousse: "état de ce qui est sec."

L'amitié est une plante qui doit résister à la sécheresse.
Friendship is a plant that must resist drought. --Joseph Joubert

Comments

[Jules Greer]

KRISTI - I remember this day, I actually have of photo of myself over in his garden pretending to take a shower later that morning.

XOXO

MOM

[Charles Orr in Flat Rock, NC]

In this phrase: "the say old wine is good for the both hair and plants!", I believe the first "the" should be "they", and the second "the" should be dropped.

Also, I would add a comma after "would-be parched vegetables" since it's followed by an independent clause.

[Kristin Espinasse]

Mom, Ive got that photo, too! ;-) Now tell me, how is the story? Does it flow? Are there any confusing parts?

[Kristin Espinasse]

Mille mercis, Charles! Your edits are in!

[Jules Greer]

Hi Charles,

I am so happy you are still on this train!!!

XOXO

JULES

[Betty Gleason with blue pencil in hand]

Lookin' good!

[Fred Lovett]

The photo on my copy is of the washing on the balcony. I cannot see the hair-washer.

go for it!

Fred.

[Mary Rack]

"and I startle as any nosey neighbor who has been found out would."
Perhaps change this to "and I startle as would any nosey neighbor who has been found out."

Also, nosy and nosey are both accepted spellings - I'm wondering which one readers would prefer?

[Carolyn Chase]

Ditto to Mary Rack "and I startle as any nosey neighbor who has been found out would" reads better "as would any nosey neighbor ..."

My only other observation is that I was left feeling slightly hanging at the end. Even something, on the last sentence, such as "as I turned back to my work" would close the scene.

I love the images and comparisons.

[Kristin Espinasse]

Fred, the photo is a random one; I didnt have a picture of my neighbor... though I do have one of Mom pretending to take a shower (she was so excited about the neighbors idea). Mom, if you are reading this, do NOT name the neighbor. You did that for the other story and I am just waiting to get into trouble! ;-)

Mary, thank you, and ditto, Carolyn, for the confirmation and for your feedback!

[Olga Brown]

Hi Kristin,
The story is interesting.
I would suggest to add one more sentence at the end: a self-answering question or an exclamation, to finish the story.

Olga.

[Ian]

"look past a ditch full of wild fennel grown as tall as our older child" - could I suggest that the comparative should read "elder child"

[Gretel]

Kristin...you take little moments in time then colour and paint them.... lovely!

[Bruce T. Paddock]

Good morning, Kristin –

Y’know, I’m starting to believe everyone in Provence is … unusual.

In the third paragraph, your neighbor is the subject of the first sentence, which makes “held high above him” sound odd. I think that the proper pronoun would be “himself,” but “held high above himself” sounds terrible. Maybe “held high above his head” or something like that?

You’ve constructed a lovely compound adjective — “modesty’s sake” — but it should probably be hyphenated.

There should be a comma after “…hair and plants!)” because what follows “and” is a complete sentence.

As described in “béton,” the introductory “In this period of sécheresse” is made up of more than one prepositional phrase, so it needs a comma after it.

The way you have it now, “would-be” modifies “parched vegetables.” If you added a hyphen, then “would-be-parched” would modify “vegetables.”

Consider a comma after “I startle.” Without it, I thought the sentence was going to go in a different direction, such as “I startle as his words reach me.”

Love the imagery in the last sentence.

[Bettye Dew]

Kristin, my comments didn't go through. I'll try this short one:

In 1st sentence, you're having us peek through the fence BEFORE parting the curtain. More chronological: If you were to sneak over to our garden, part its curtain of faded jasmine, and peer ...

[Bettye Dew]

That should be "garden fence" above, of course. I vote for a comma after "startle," the more common "nosy" spelling, and one hypen in "modesty's-sake shower curtain."

If you decide the ending is too abrupt, you can condense and add, as in this rough example: With my cheeks glowing as red as those well-watered tomatoes, I take a quick step backwards. The jasmine curtain falls together, and today's show is fini.

[Carolyn Parsons]

My edit suggestions:

If you were to peek through our backyard fence or part its curtain of faded jasmine, you’d look past a ditch full of wild fennel grown as tall as our eldesr child and spy our next-door voisin showering beneath the fiery heavens at daybreak! The man is scrub-a-dub-dubbing right in the middle of his potager!



But you wouldn't see a steel nozzle above his head or an anti-skid mat beneath his feet. Only a sturdy kitchen stool separates him from the muddy ground below, with its neatly trellised vines—vines which are oddly bursting with fruit during this, The Year of the Drought.

There, amongst ripe red tomates, stands my eco-conscious neighbor, garden hose held high above him. I see no shelves on which to set his shampoo. (Is that a vinegar rinse he is using? They say old wine is good for both hair and plants!) There’s no modesty's-sake shower curtain to protect him from this housewife-voyeur. (Hence those bright blue swim trunks?)

On closer look, there is a serene expression on the showerer's face, as water from the tuyau trickles down, splashing and quenching the thirsty légumes beneath.

 In this period of sécheresse, the municipal Powers That Be forbid us to water our gardens... but no one said you couldn't wash yourself! I watch as the shower water rains down over the otherwise parched vegetables, and I am impressed with my neighbor's clever solution to irrigating his garden.

"You ought to try it sometime!" the man in the blue swim trunks calls out, and I startle, as would any nosey neighbor who has been found out. I can feel my cheeks becoming as warm as the burning sun, turning as red as those well-watered tomatoes.

Note to Kristin--I did this without reading any of the other comments...some of them are very worthwhile as well. Good luck, and get some rest occasionally!

[Kristin Espinasse]

Thank you Ian, for elder.

Olga, Ive taken your suggestion and added a finale (is that the word? :-)

Bruce, All credit for that compound adjective goes to Behind the Scenes Bill who modified my modesty with -sake, for modestys-sake.

Bettye, Phew! Thanks for catching the out-of-order sequence. Ive reworded it. Also, your example (in response to Oglas suggestion) helped me to write the last paragraph. 

Ive changed startle to freeze... I hope the commas on either side are still correct...

If anyone has read the essay since these edits have been incorporated, please let me know if it is now clear.

Carolyn, thank you... but I had difficulty finding the updates. Ill trust that all is okay, now that the recent edits have gone in.

[Bettye Dew]

Excellent revision of the ending, Kristin. It sounds like you and it rounds out the story. This is a well-written and interesting selection for the book.

[Kristin Espinasse]

Thank you, Bettye!

[Sushil Dawka]

Hello Kristin,
Could I suggest a change in the last sentence. I was reading it aloud and the three 'as's (oops, not sure how to spell that) sounded a bit odd. Perhaps the third 'as' could become an 'and'.
Also, I think 'older' was more appropriate. Older and elder are really the same word with the former more modern. Elder has therefore come to signify rank as well (church elder, elderly gentleman etc.), but both are correct.

[Kristin Espinasse]

Many thanks, Sushil. I agree, as times three = too many! Also, Ive switched elder back to older (Im going with the way that I would say it.); no offence to my wonderful editors above. 

[Olga Brown]

Kristin,
I like the final variant.
I could vividly imagine the floral curtains falling together after your took your nose out of them.
Good job!

Olga.