la panne

même pas peur!

cat in a box (c) Kristin Espinasse
Psst. There, in the right-hand corner. A cat in a box on a steep ledge. Ever feel like that? (photo taken in 2006, in Italy)

même pas peur! (mem pah purr)

    :  Not afraid!

Même pas peur is an expression French kids say when confronted with something or someone daunting. It means "I'm not a bit afraid!"

 Audio File: Listen to me talk about today's appointment in MarseillesDownload MP3 or Wave file

Aujourd'hui, j'ai un punch biopsie et j'ai même pas peur... et je dis n'importe quoi... Today I have a punch biopsy and I'm not all scared... and I'm just talking nonsense (...when I say that I'm not afraid)... 

A DAY IN A FRENCH LIFE.... by Kristin Espinasse

Même Pas Peur: A few examples 

Même pas peur! The kid on the playground says to his cohorts, when the school bully threatens him: "Même pas peur! That guy doesn't scare me a bit!"

Même pas peur! I'm not afraid! The French woman says with a wink, when her hairdresser suggests chopping off all her locks, for a new look. 

Même pas peur! My son jokes to his friends as he inches over to the edge of the falaise... and jumps 15 meters to the shimmering waters below.

Même pas peur! my husband says, when I hand him the toilet brush and point to the chore.

And ... Même pas peur! I tell myself this morning, as I head out, now, to the doctor's. May the results of this skin biopsy come back speedily, different from the last time... and the time before that....


To read about my first experience with skin cancer, click here.  

Kristin and Jean-Marc Espinasse
Then... (Kristin, Max, Jean-Marc, and Jackie)

Jean-Marc and Kristin Espinasse
...and now! (Max, Braise, Jackie, Smokey, Kristin, and Jean-Marc). JM looks a little serious, but he's just impatient to get the picture over with, after several retakes. What do Braise and Smokey look like they're thinking? Comments here.

Note: the first photo was taken at Domaine du Banneret (Jean-Marc's uncle's winery, in Chateauneuf du Pape). It was before Jean-Marc began his own winery, Domaine Rouge-Bleu. We moved again, last September and are still settling in, here near Bandol.

Other places we have lived: Marseilles (when we first met), St. Maximin (after Max was born), Les Arcs-sur-Argens (the longest we ever stayed put!), Ste. Cécile-les-Vignes, and now we are back near the sea, where we started from!

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For more online reading: The Lost Gardens: A Story of Two Vineyards and a Sobriety


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I will be thinking positive thoughts about you today.

Diana Barron

Good Luck Kristi! with love from Diana, Perth, Australia.

Jens from Copenhagen

Good luck today!

Sarah LaBelle near Chicago

Indeed, good luck.

It is great to see photos with a few years between them. Those children grow so much!


Good luck and good wishes.
Ivana from USA

Kimberly from California

You have a very beautiful family, Kristin!

Wish you best of luck!

Lee Isbell

All good thoughts coming from California.

Sandy Vann

Positive thoughts, light and best wishes Kristin today. We are all waiting to hear the good results. Why does it too often take awhile to get results back? Seems to be a rather common experience from what we hear.
See and hear the good news already arriving...all will be well. Bon chance and bises.

Jackie in Natick, MA

Best thoughts to you for perfect results. Your family is simply beautiful!


Thinking of you xoxoxo

Jackie Durham

Good luck, Kristin. Thoughts and prayers with you today. I suppose this is a different doctor, different clinic, so let's hope for different results this time.


Wishing you tons of love, joy and peace. Everyone looks so grown up, handsome and beautiful. Be well.

Audrey Wilson

Thinking positively for you Kristin.
Love, Audrey

Patrine Baptist

Sending you strength and love from Adelaide South Australia

Angela Sargent

I'll be thinking calming thoughts for you today.
Good luck. Angela


So many blessings, let this be one of them. Love & prayers are yours. Hugs

Dorothy Judd

Very much hoping you get good news.

carole Fitzgerald

Dear Kristin , good luck with your results today. All the very best from down under in Australia ,love and best wishes from Carole x

cj Warley

Will be awaiting your good news, n'aie pas peur! Thinking of you, and smiling. -- cathy/cj

Lisa Simon

I am sending a boat load of love and positive, beautiful thoughts to you, dear Kristin!

Sam Lynn

Thanking about you and wish you the best of luck and the best of outcomes!

Irene Tanedo

Dear Kristin,
You are always remembered in my prayers and I'm sure the results will be negative of any dreadful disease. Not to worry, God will see you through..Cheers!

Eileen - Charlottesville, VA

Thinking about you Kristin. Sending positive thoughts your way. Both your family photos are great!

Deborah Carter

Sending you good thoughts for a clear, positive result, and to remain that way! I'm sure you feel all that support from everyone around the world who follows your blog and wishes you the very best! Deborah in hot Melbourne, Australia.

Annette Heath

Have no fear....all will be well, either way.
Love love love the family photos...such a beautiful family! Re: doggie bag...un sac de chien???

You contribute so much to the lives of others with your say merci for sharing seems so inadequate. I have learned so much and enjoyed so much through the years.

Prayers and good thoughts for
you always, Kristin. Annette

Jan greene

With you in thought and prayers, Kristin. The wait is the killer! Hang on, on day at a time. Trusting and hoping with you! The photos and just perfect!
Expecting a warm week to melt the snow on Cape Cod!

Cheryl Alters Jamison

Kristin and family: Sending you love, good wishes, and prayers from Santa Fe.

Ed from north carolina

Kristin, after four years of college french how much conversational french was possible as expat in France?

Donna Grieder

Kristin, I join the others who are send focused good thoughts to you today. Even with some fear, you face the issue head-on - such a good example!

Best wishes to you and your fine -and photogenic!- family,

Donna ( Texas )


Positive thoughts from Texas today. MN

Ken Scupp

Kristi- Tout ira bien. Bonne chance et meilleur souhaits


Good thoughts coming to you from Phoenix!

Herm in Phoenix, Az

Salut Kristin,

Je vous souhaite une bonne santé, mon amie


Thoughts and prayers are with you from Illinois as well.


Même pas peur et bonne santé, Kristin!

Valerie McCaffrey

You will havethe graceand the strengthyou need. And don't forget thatyou have aguardian angel. Put that angel to work!

Hebe Shipp

I will chime in from Minnesota. Meilleurs voeux pour ta bonne santé!

Pauline Kneebone

Happy New Year Kristin, may 2013 be a joyous fun filled and memorable year for you and your family. Greetings from warm Perth,(38-40 degrees celcius, )Australia. Sending good thoughts for today and merci for your lovely notes to us all. Pauline

Bill in St. Paul

Good luck on your punch biopsy, Kristin! Great pictures - neither you nor Jean-Marc have aged at all. As Smokey (or is it Braise) is looking up at the squirrel saying "Throw one more acorn and you're toast!"

Julie Farrar

Thinking good thoughts for you today, sent from St. Louis, MO. I go on Wednesday for my annual checkup and hope many of your readers are thinking about setting up their own dermatology appointments.

Braise - "Hey, is that a squirrel I see?"
Smokey - "Superstar! C'est moi!"

julie camp

Love from Julie.


Good luck Kristin. I have been there, I know the anxiety. I ended up having to have surgery for a positive diagnosis on my face. The surgery was quick with no follow-up treatment needed and I have been problem free for the ten years ever since. The worry is the worst of this but hang in there you will be fine. Positive vibes from Vancouver, B.C.


Kristin, you are in my prayers.
Love from Karene in So. California


Sending positive thoughts from Sebastopol, California!

Tom B, Jersey City NJ

Prayers are with you!

Ah, the plight of fair skin!

Lora M, Illinois

Sending prayers from across the pond. Hugs!!

Deborah Rothenberger

My husband shares your posts with me because I was treated for melanoma (11 mm tumor) two years ago. I put the whole thing in God's hands and have had peace every since. Once in a while a little doubt creeps in and I remind myself of what a friend told me; "Do you believe or not? If you don't believe, don't bother to pray, and if you believe, don't worry." Good advice and may God bless you with good health.

Karen from Phoenix

Sending sweet thoughts your way.


Lin Powell

Thinking nothing but positive thoughts for you with the appointment today. From Victoria, B.C Canada

Linda, Port Townsend WA

Bonne Chance, Chère Dame!

Dina from Texas

Bonne Chance. Wherever you find yourself today, you have gone on the wings of a thousand prayers. Must make you feel light and airy. Lots of love and blessings.

Cold Cold Cold today but beautiful blue skies.

Jean(ne) in MN

May the positive thoughts of all your readers lift you up today.


Lots of prayers and hope and blessings are coming your way! xo patti

Cynthia Lewis

Thinking of you today and hoping that you will have good results from the "punch" biopsy. Thank you for sending the lovely family photos. My best wishes.....

Vicki, San Francisco Bay area

Lifting up a prayer for you, Kristi. Peace be with you as you await the results.
The "then" and "now" pictures are great! You are blessed!

Jackie Miller

Very positive thoughts are on their way. Remember to use your Mom's bouncers to keep out the negitive flow to your mind.
Jackie, CA

Kate O'Kula

Sending loving thoughts, light, and energy to you and your family... and your doctor! Words of Julianne of Norwich come to mind: "All will be well, and all manner of things will be well." Prayer is coming to you from Rhode Island.

Barbara Berndt

Bon courage! Ces maudits cancers ne te vaincront point! Tu as le soutien de ta foi et de tes maints lecteurs.

Amie James

Thank you for sharing the good and the bad with us. You push us to think and to pray and to live fully, with joy.

Leslie NYC

Hi, Kristin.
I am with Jackie, from CA:
Bring two strapping bouncers with you to the doctor or to the moments when you are waiting to hear the results. Then, in the waiting room, find a spot with three chairs.
Your New Year's post also reminded me of what a favorite yoga teacher used to tell us:
"Your mind can be like a bad neighborhood: don't go in there alone."
Thanks for letting us know about your appointment. I wish for the best for you.

Cheryl in STL

Bon courage---and prayers for a good outcome and for a speedy one! On pense tous à toi.

Christine Webb-Curtis

Think good thoughts about today. I will be. So, as Jackie suggests that you don't go into your mind alone, we'll all be there with you.

Chris W-C from Carmichael

Kristin Espinasse

Thank you very much for the prayers and good wishes! Jean-Marc began reading me your notes as we sat in the waiting room at the doctor's office (first, JM had to play my embarrasing sound file (for today's word) aloud, and tease me about that! His humor relaxed me, just as your notes have). After a needle to the nose and that "punch", it only took two stiches to tie things up this time. Results back in a week. Again, merci beaucoup for taking the time to send these words of encouragement. P.S. have you seen your dermato lately? What's keeping you?

Bill Facker

Sending you bunches of healing Aloha from Kauai! Bill

Susan Souza

Good thoughts are with you for a clean biopsy. But you have handled every turn with true grace. Your family is beautiful and your life very normal. some of us dream of having "your life" in beautiful France and you give us that through your stories. Take care

Johanna DeMay

Bonjour chère Kristi,

Here in Albuquerque we are thinking of you, wishing you all the best for this new year, and especially for a positive result from today's test!

Thank you for the "then & now" photos of the family. We love your sharing them with us! The kids are so gorgeous, and you look as lovely in this recent photo as you do in the old one! How do you do that??

Much love,

Johanna & Will

Laura Isenstein

Kristin, we are praying for the outcome you hope for. I so much enjoy reading your blog and learning the French words and phrases you introduce. I love getting to know you and your family through your posts and look forward to the day we can meet somewhere in Provence.

Rosemarie in Louisville, KY

You inspired me to be brave for my first skin cancer surgery last March (I had another on the other side of my face 6 months later). Now I've progressed to treating pre-cancer on my jaw-line with a topical chemo cream.
If it wasn't for your fearless posting of your first skin cancer incision, I would have had beaucoups de peur. Thanks for putting yourself out there again and again.

I hope and pray that your most recent test will result in good news and no more stitches or scars!

Mary G

Wishing you only speedy good news!

Patty Blue Garni


You have touched so many lives and continue to do so in such a gentle and gracious way. Good thoughts and prayers are being sent your way everyday..and are not limited to while you wait in the doctor's office or while waiting for results.

Your sharing your daily life experiences (and that of your beautiful family, as well) is a joy for your readers/friends. Thank you.


Pat Cargill

Best wishes to you Kristin as you wait for results, thoughts and prayers are showering you. Your example gives encouragement to others to visit their dermatologists.

Braise seems to be sniffing the air, maybe thinking ah, there are so many new smells here, I need to investigate...when will the picture-taking be over?

Smokey is simply feeling content and happy as a bug in a rug since he is cuddled up close to you, with your arm around him...just being with y.o.u.

Grace McKee

Smokey and Braise are thinking "Is this ever going to be over?"

Best of luck with the skin biopsy.


Bonne chance, Kristin, and I thought your French sounded excellent today, sans blague!


Our dearest Kristi,
Please know that you're in our prayers today (and always).
You are such a kind and loving person.Jesus forever remains your constant companion and will give you courage and strength to get through this examination.
Feel this hug?
Thinking of you,dear friend.
Love, Natalia XO

PS Wonderful pictures of your beautiful family!
What a gift you have!

Stacy ~ Sweet Life Farm ~ Applegate, Oregon

I love the family photos! Braise seems to be dreaming up her next adventure while Smokey is pleased as punch to show the world how handsome and loved he is!

I am grateful JM brought his sense of humor along to comfort you. Holding you in my prayers and thinking sunny thoughts of you!


You've got a lovely family, chère Kristin. J'espère que tout s'est bien passé chez le dermato. Bon courage!
Braise must have felt like JM, waiting for the photo session to be over. :-)

Debbie Ambrous -

Dear Kristin,
I hope very much that your biopsy has good news. My heart goes out to you. The family portrait with the golden is beautiful. I wish we could enjoy as much golden sun as we wanted without any worries. What a coincidence to read your blog at this particular moment. I just returned from my visit to the dermatologist. Since I moved to Alabama I must travel close to 4 hours to see a dermatologist at the University which my previous doctor in Florida recommended. She did a biopsy of an irregular place on my hip, so now I must wait for the results. I'm thankful to have an expert taking care of me, just wish she was closer to my home. The bonus for this trip was shopping at the sales. New shoes, buy one pair get the other 1/2 half. Maybe that will take my mind off the biopsy.
All the best to you and family!

Debbie Ambrous -

Dear Kristin,
I thought I had to write again because after I wrote the first post I read on my niece's Facebook that I must share with you. It is a quotation from Maya Angelou:
"People will forget that you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel."
So many people are continually uplifted by what you say. Keep those thoughts locked in your mind and heart, along with the other treasures you have stored already.
Debbie Ambrous

Mary Eichbauer

Best of luck with your biopsy, Kristy! I'm having one this week, too. We'll both hope for excellent news.



Smokey is thinking: Thtffffft (a/k/a razzzz)

Braise is thinking: Is that a bird?

I hope your biopsy results yield good news.


All good wishes to you! Danielle

Sunny Bridge

You are in my thoughts and prayers as you await results. Thanks for so honestly sharing your challenges. Here's hoping you do not have to have ANY more cutting! It's been about four months since my latest skin graft after the most recent basal cell carcinoma was removed from my nose, and one good part of the whole ordeal was having a conversational opening to encourage people to get their weird spots checked immediately. Your honest sharing is benefitting many, I'm sure. Keep your chin up (and your sunscreen on, of course)! On the plus side, it's a great opportunity to collect and wear a lot of fabulous hats. Bless you! Sunny from Colorado

Janet smajstrla

Best wishes to you. I hope they don't make you wait too long for the results. I'm praying those who read the results will have a definitive answer. I had a shot in my nose this past summer and it was so painful! It made my eyes water and I wanted to slug the doctor! Absolutely the worst part of that day! I laugh now about my instinct to attack the doctor. Sounds like you have found some humor in the day which is so important in keeping your chin up (and your nose too! :)


Bon courage ! Hoping for good news next week!

Vera Marie Badertscher

So what's that gang sign that Jackie is making? Or maybe its a good luck signal to Mom?

Leslie in Portland, Oregon

Bravo to you for continuing your periodic exams and taking action to resolve any uncertainty! We will be thinking of you all this week with particularly positive, encouraging thoughts and wishes for peace and the best of health. Fondly, Leslie, with Henry and Bob

debra ashe

I hope that you get good results from your test.

Judi Boeye Miller, Lake Balboa, CA

Wishing you good test results! And, I think your question is a good one.... I think it's time I made an appointment to get checked out myself - so easy to let it go. You'd think I'd be hyper-vigilant with my husband having survived melanoma twice now! A bit of the 'head in the sand' syndrome for me! You're doing a good job of taking care of yourself! You should be proud of yourself!

Marianne Rankin

I know what it's like to wait for results, and will pray for you.

Have the rest of the family checked themselves to be sure they don't have any irregularities n their skin? You all live in the same place, so they could have had similar sun exposure.

It is wonderful to have a picture of all four of you together - six, counting the dogs. It's a great shot of all of you, and one of the best of Smokey I've ever seen. I enjoy pictures of the family.

Hope you continue to settle in and enjoy your new home. Wishing you all a terrific year.

Susan Carter

Positive thoughts & prayers & hugs are being sent your way.


Bonne chance Kristin!

Sending positive thoughts your way today.

nadine goodban

Je vous souhaite TOUT ce que vous souhaitez, Kristin ! Toutes nos prières collectives vont vers vous et porteront leurs fruits.
Vous n'êtes pas seule.
Nadine, Napa, CA.

Sherrill Spencer

The waiting is the worst part. I know, I have been through it also. Sending lots of positive thoughts your way! Take care of yourself and keep your spirits up! ((( Hugs! ! ! )))

Ronni Ebbers

Much good luck. We're waiting with you and wishing on stars that you receive good news.



Like the others, I also wish you luck and a good result.


Chere Kristin,
Sending you lots and lots of love and happy thoughts your way...all will be well, all will be well. Stay positive and know that you are SURROUNDED by a world wide family, all praying for YOU!!! :)


Had BCC on my forearm at 28. Did not see about it 'til 3 years later. Even so, the damage was small. Won't wait again! I wasn't prepared for the extent of the previous biopsy on your forehead. Your mom's words from September 2011 made me cry. Meme pas peur. God go with you. . .and give you a BCC-free diagnosis.

gabrielle tsabag

Chere, Kristin,

Best wishes for a positive outcome ... sending lots of goods vibes from Southern California!



I love the pictures of then and now! The dogs are saying "the whole family together, this is bliss!"
I hope all goes well.


Good thoughts and a prayer from South Florida! I hope for the best of news for you!

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